Brief Boys Mitchell and Patton review the Stonemen New York Brief, a unique handmade cut from Australia.
Patton: I wish I’d thought to wear these when I was actually in New York. I thought about it on the plane. Such a missed opportunity.
Mitchell: You keep saying New York. Are you afraid to tell people you went to New Jersey?
P: I took the train into New York whenever possible. Think about it: I could’ve mooned the Chrysler Building with the Chrysler Building.
M: How meta.
P: And – another nice thing, had I worn these in New York – they’re superb for lots of walking. They have a great cut that’s very supportive, never slip, and hug and hold everything in place.
M: Yes, those Aussies at Stonemen really know what they’re doing. To be honest, I was wary of another undergarment that is focused more on the pretty picture or pattern than the engineering, but I was pleasantly surprised by how well-made these are, all around. The pictures on their website make them look a little rubbery and formless, but they might just be over-Photoshopped. In person, you can tell that these are as light and flexible as any other cotton brief.
P: Agreed. It’s amazing how well these fit, especially for a low-rise brief. And they’re gorgeous. I remember when you used to wear Ginch-Gonch all the time. Cute underwear, but not the greatest quality. These are light-years ahead. The only thing I’d point out is that there’s no obvious pouch design, yet it’s weird how, once you put them on, this doesn’t seem to be a problem.
M: I expected to feel confined in these, too. There must be a magic spell at work, though, because they’re quite roomy.
P: I kind of want to buy all of them. Well, almost all – I probably don’t need the ones with hummingbirds on them. But the cityscapes, the sunsets, the nebula, stampeding stallions, ocean waves – I need all of them, for sure. It’s kind of like buying a cool t-shirt, except you need to be on a pretty intimate basis with your friends to show these off.
M: And most of those come with multiple waistband choices. Speaking of the waistband, by the way, another nice feature is that the seam rests on the hip, which is a nice change from briefs that tend to scratch at the base of your spine. So far, these haven’t bothered me.
P: Anybody who stocks up on them will also be helping the environment. For every pair they sell, Stonemen donates one Australian dollar to nonprofit conservation groups intent on preserving the oceanic ecosystem.
M: They’re big on that in Australia.
P: Almost as big as they are on awesome underwear.
M: You know, the more I think of them, the more I like them. Even the way the screen print continues all the way around, a full 360º like a panorama – they’re truly a work of art.
P: Well said.
COMFORT / Excellent
STYLE / Excellent
QUALITY / Excellent
VALUE / Good
BOTTOM LINE / Beautifully made in every way, and worth every Australian cent.